your better is driving me up the wall

The new Nike “My Better Is Better” ad series — the ones with the people yapping, not the ones with the Saul Williams soundtrack — are, for my money, the most utterly obnoxious commercials this side of Apply Directly to the Forehead. A bunch of people looking into the camera and telling me how great they are? That’s it? What’s the message here: Wear Nikes and you too can be a world-class self-regarding jerk?

Have you noticed that in TV spots dealing with sports and sports equipment no one ever seems to be having fun? Nobody seems to be playing sports, but rather using sports to settle some kind of grudge against the world.

I probably sound like Grandpa Simpson, but really: I don’t want to hear it. I’ve never reached for the clicker so fast in my life. But Williams’s “List of Demands” — that I reach for the clicker to turn up.