Losing My (Star Wars) Religion
I was stricken with some form of Death Plague when the new animated Star Wars film, The Clone Wars, screened in D.C., and didn’t get to see it. Now, I’d normally consider myself a pretty big Star Wars nut — not a raving, con-going geek, but the sort of fan whose love for the series probably borders the lines of social acceptability (ie: I only dressed up for one prequel premiere, and I was in high school at the time, which excuses a lot). And I was curious to see where Lucas might be taking — or allowing others to take — the franchise. But now that TCW is out, I just can’t see myself paying to see it. And indeed, I’m beginning to question whether I can really count myself as a Star Wars fan at all. This guy pretty much nails it:
A week ago I would have told you that I was just “uninterested” in seeing The Clone Wars. Today, after reading some trusted reviews, you would have to drag me kicking and screaming to see this abortion of a movie. From what I have read it is everything I have feared in a Star Wars film. The plot centers around Jabba the Hutt’s son nicknamed Stinky (not making this up) getting kidnapped and Anakin Skywalker and his new, hip, cool, sassy, spunky, teenage female sidekick — who apparently refers to him as “Sky Guy” — try to rescue him. This addition is on the level of adding Poochie to The Itchy and Scratchy Show, only for real. Fuck!
So let’s do the math: this is the seventh Star Wars movie to be released in theaters. I love two of them — Star Wars (the one released in 1977 that was nominated for the Academy Award for Best Picture, not the one released in 1997 when Greedo shot first) and Empire — think one is good (Jedi), think one is bad (Revenge of the Sith), two are putrid (The Phantom Menace and Attack of the Clones) and another I refuse to see. How can I call myself a fan when I only like 29% of the product?
The prequels weren’t any good, but somehow they were excusable; if you strained yourself, you could even come up with things to appreciate (whatever problems those films had, they weren’t short on spectacle). The Clone Wars, on the other hand, seems to exemplify the sort of crassness, laziness, and cheapness that’s plagued Lucas’s work for a while — only this time, there’s no way to explain it away. A lot of people predicted that the prequels would be the end of Star Wars fandom, but I think it’ll be the the sad, drawn out dribble of truly lackluster post-prequel products like The Clone Wars and Lucas’s rumored upcoming TV series that really do in the franchise. With the prequels, at least, Lucas made an effort, and both the fanboy reunion atmosphere and the tidal wave of hype allowed people to convince themselves that, Hey, this is all a lot of fun. Now it’s obvious no one cares, and it’s become a slog.
People who held out hope that Lucas would husband the Star Wars mythos responsibly are forgetting their history and therefore doomed to repeat it.
On the other hand, those of us old enough to remember Harvey Korman and Bea Arthur in the Star Wars Holiday Special pretty much knew what to expect. (Horrifyingly, the Korman/Arthur skits weren’t the worst part of the special — the supposedly serious stuff was about 100 times worse.)
— J Mann · Aug 15, 03:28 PM · #
As long it has lightsabres and lots of explosions, I’ll be satisfied. The key to happiness is low standards.
— Ali Choudhury · Aug 15, 06:23 PM · #
I’d never dress up, but I feel the same way about the series you do. I’ve seen every Star Wars film in the theater when they were released. I can even remember watching the original Star Wars Christmas Special when it was broadcast. But the new cartoon prequel? It’s about as Star Wars as that Ewoks cartoon during the eighties. Even then – I was about 10 years old – I knew it was the height of lameness and not worth the bother.
— Mark · Aug 15, 07:04 PM · #
The pieces fall into place!
— Freddie · Aug 15, 07:23 PM · #
Just so long as you weren’t dressed as a chained-up Leia…
— Jeremiah · Aug 15, 07:43 PM · #
I went as Jabba the Hut. And didn’t have to dress up.
No, I went as Obi-Wan, in a robe hand-made by my mother. (Yes, really. I made the front page of the local newspaper the next day, too.)
— Peter Suderman · Aug 15, 08:23 PM · #
Star Wars is on that mental shelf of good stories gone “muh” through commercial interest, like “Pooh”, and “Dr. Seuss”. “Muh” is a word some of our friends made up in college for anything messed up—and you have to spit it out like something that tastes bad when you say it.
— Joules · Aug 17, 08:34 AM · #